Halloween

Early in the show, Buffy makes a point of telling Willow that Halloween costumes are about getting to be something you're not--good girls play at being vixens, for instance. Irony alert: Willow and Giles, instead of pretending what they aren't, reveal what they really are. Willow starts out dressing like a ghost, no surprise for the girl who's goal is to be unnoticed by the mean girls. As circumstances happen, though...she's confidently parading around in a sleek, sexy outfit--although she does have the occasionally uncomfortable moment when she realizes someone is looking. And again, Oz sees her and asks "Who is that girl?" She's starting to be a bit less ghosty. (Oh, and even though Willow was appalled by Buffy lying to Giles in the last episode, she helps Buffy steal the Watchers Diary; apparently stealing information isn't bad.)

Giles is a surprise in the episode, too. Mr. Prim Librarian beats a man to a pulp, using his bare hands. Ethan, a friend from Giles' youth, is a trickster bent on creating chaos. To save Buffy and the rest of the town, Giles pounds on Ethan till he finally reveals how to stop the spell. Interestingly, Ethan says to Giles "they have no idea who you are, what you're capable of, do they?" There's a past that is only slightly revealed, but the parts we get are tantalizing. Even though Buffy will not consider killing a human, Giles has more flexible standards; Ethan believes Giles will kill him, and later in the series, Giles kills Ben and plots against Spike--but that's not for a while.

Overall, though, manhood is the theme that keeps popping up. Before Halloween, Buffy is baffled when Xander is upset that she rescues him from a bully. Xander explains that a black eye goes away, but a slight on his manhood never fades. Then, Xander becomes a soldier, protecting "the women," mainly a helpless 17th c Buffy. The manhood subtext continues. Soldier Xander shouts orders that Buffy, Willow and Cordy--and even Angel--immediately follow. He takes action as a leader and earns respect. He even fights the bully to protect Buffy and admits that gives him an odd feeling of "closure." When they get their memories back, Xander is the first to reach Buffy after she slams Spike into submission--yet again, he's her backup, even with Angel there--but her responses to Xander are cursory; Angel is where she's focused.

Quick note about Buffy/Angel: she wants to be girly, to remind him of the girls he presumably chased as a young man. She doesn't talk to him about any of those types of issues, just makes assumptions. Angel isn't the only one in that relationship that doesn't do conversation much, but somehow Angel's mysterious reticence is what gets the focus. There's a power imbalance in their relationship--which isn't necessarily a bad thing--but I'm trying to figure out what I'm seeing and how to say it so it makes sense.