Episode Three: Witch

What does it mean to be a man? BtVS is usually cited as an exploration into girl power, and in interviews Whedon speaks eloquently about women's studies and his mission as a male feminist--but the flip side of that is exploring what it means to be a man in a post-patriarchal paradigm. That is never answered explicitly in BtVS--in fact, it's not even alluded to as a question--but hints of the issue pop up like prairie dogs every so often, quickly scanning the situation, then retreating. The third episode of the series, which completely leaves the whole "Master Ascending" metaplot, is overtly about girls and their mothers, but the "what does it mean to be a man" issue is raised in several times.

Does Xander accept being emasculated to be one of Buffy's "slayerettes?" Willow uses that term in this epsiode as she and Xander affirm that they are choosing to be by Buffy's side, choosing to be in danger and fight for right. Both X and Willow emphatically agree that they want to be "slayerettes" for Buffy. The feminization of Buffy's title, the Slayer, is at once both bonding them into a unit and somewhat linguistically demarcating them as weaker, as the female partners. But by embracing the designation, Xander becomes one of the gang and perhaps by being inclusive, "-ettes" loses the derogatory connotations that it might otherwise imply.

A couple other snippets of conversation stand out:

• Buffy, giddy under the influence of a weakening spell, is aided by Willow and Xander, refers to Xander as her "Xander-shaped friend," and says it's as if he's not even a boy because he's so nice and isn't just trying to date her (which he'd been trying to get the nerve up to do). Although the audience knows that he is still attracted to Buffy, she becomes the unattainable dream girl, as alluded to in season 6 by Xander's financee, who knows that Xander's first allegiance is to Buffy. To be a man in Buffy's life, he chooses to not be someone who she thinks of as "a guy." Both times when Xander does get a serious love interest, the females involved are not actually friends with Xander or, significantly, with Willow and Buffy. Is part of being a man in the next wave dependant on checking your hormones at the door?
• In an especially interesting exchange, Xander says that Willow is like his best guy friend, but who understands girls. Does Xander pick up on Willow's sexual ambiguity long before Willow realizes she's gay? (and before the writers decide that, based on interviews). And does having a friend of the opposite gender require that there be no sexual tension, that the "friendness" of the relationship completely trump any awareness of other vibes? (Willow and Xander's one epically mistimed kiss in season 2 almost proves how dangerous it is to imagine a physical relationship with your "friend." Do new age men have to only notice a female's intellectual attributes if they are to be real friends?
  
• All these seemingly emasculating concerns are juxtaposed against a plot line involving cheerleaders. Buffy, Cordelia, Amy and a bevy of others bounce around in short skirts, which Xander panting on the sidelines. Xander is obviously enjoying the view, but does Whedon unwittingly divide women into "my friend" (Buffy, who Xander chooses to not actively pursue so they can be friends) and "my eye candy," girls who he'd gape at and date, but not "friends" (When we get to season 3, we can argue about whether Xander buying newly-destitute Cordelia a prom dress is about friendship, or about something else; I'll argue that's not indicative of the depth of their relationship)
• If Giles is the role model for manhood in an age of female power, note that he both guides Buffy and takes orders from her (last episode he does that). He places himself in danger for her, and insures her safety as best he can--but always conceding that she's stronger and more able. And notably, Giles' only male friend (Ethan) is a destructive force in the Buffy-verse; Giles is only safe around women, it seems.
  

I'm realizing how much I'm writing about Xander in these early posts. That's curious; I have things to say about Willow, and about the Buffy/Joyce relationship, but...it's late. I'm done for tonight.